When I started as an apprentice I managed to miss out on all this sort of s=
henanigans, but my first job was assisting with stock take in the store. Th=
e storemans father had run some sort of carpentry or joinery shop in the im=
mediate post WW2 period, and had a whole heap of stories about sending appr=
entices off on various jobs.

One of the favourites was to send the new apprentice down to the hardware s=
hop for a bastard file. Apprentice would duly trot off on errand and get to=
 the hardware shop only to find that behind the counter was the most gorgeo=
us young lady, and there was no way he was going to ask her for one of THOS=
E. Said young lady was well aware what he had been sent down for and would =
feign total lack of knowledge of files, suggesting maybe it was this one or=
 that one that he had been sent for, all the while avoiding the required it=
em. Apprentice would duly make many trips back and forth between the worksh=
op and store with different files, but it would take a long time to get the=
 required one.

Another hardware store got that fed up with apprentices being sent down for=
 striped paint they got out a tin of white and some colour mixer, poured it=
 in and gave it one turn of the stirrer to get a suitable stripe in the pai=
nt and took the money. Boss wasn't too pleased and that practice was curtai=
led for a while.



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