*spellchecker -> holy grail

:-)

On Fri, Nov 28, 2014, at 05:13 PM, smplx wrote:
> Q. What prevents a software engineer traveling back in time?
> A. the 640k barrier
>=20
> Word association (software engineer):
>    * Planck -> PIC
>    * Christmas -> Google shares
>    * bugs -> issues
>    * gigabyte -> small
>    * deliverable -> lottery
>    * bug free -> hell freezing over
>    * portable -> new language
>    * easily fixed -> hardware problem
>    * failsafe -> software free
>    * easy to maintain -> someone else's problem
>    * cheap -> can't be done
>    * expensive -> how can I help
>    * safety critical -> cash cow
>    * documentation -> babylon
>    * keyboard -> shortcuts
>    * mouse -> see keyboard
>    * screen -> not big enough
>    * version control -> zip
>    * compression -> multiple times is best
>    * foalting point to ascii -> sprintf
>    * floating point -> always
>    * ASCII -> XML
>    * internet -> too slow
>    * 300 Baud -> say what?
>    * 4MB -> boot loader
>    * 640k -> ring buffer
>    * 2GB -> small file
>    * 4GB -> small graphics card
>    * CPU register -> unicorn
>    * Open Source Software -> anarchy
>    * free software -> salery
>    * marketing manager -> devil
>    * project manager -> devil's assistant
>    * compiler writer -> superman
>    * technical author -> saint
>    * sales rep -> free lunch
>    * C -> assembly programmer's nemessis
>    * C++ -> C programmer's nemessis
>    * Fortran -> hyroglyphics
>    * graphics -> library
>    * unix -> apprehension
>    * socket -> see unix
>    * device driver -> easy, but no time to write
>    * alcohol -> helps
>    * coffee -> helps
>    * diagram -> napkin
>    * easy to use -> big red button
>    * difficult to use -> blue and red buttons
>    * small footprint -> single DVD deliverable
>    * regular updates -> buggy as hell
>    * v2 -> don't bother trying to use v1
>    * v3 -> v1 is no hoper
>    * windows 2000 -> unkept promise
>    * FreeBSD -> well kept secret
>    * virtual machine -> somewhere safe to run MS windows
>    * 80286 -> prehistoric
>    * ARM -> BBC micro
>    * cryptographic key -> xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
>    * software engineer -> super fantastic wonderful mega being
>    * programmer -> scum
>    * BASIC programmer -> pond scum
>    * manager (formally BASIC programmer) -> sir

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