What men want is to drive women wild in bedPlease help the poor things? |
"Sexual pleasure in woman is a kind of magic spell; it demands complete abandon..." Simone de Beauvoir |
Yes, what men want is to drive a women wild in bed.
But how can a man do that if he doesn't know what you actually like?
The sad truth is that most men are insecure about their performance between the sheets, and that fact should not really be surprising to anyone who gives it a moment's thought. Where would the average man go to learn how to be good in bed? Books or magazines are just not going to teach him what a woman wants, and (help us) porno movies won't show him anything beyond some awkward fumbling and a money shot.
If he didn't have the advantage of an experienced, firm, and vocal lover to teach him the ropes, he is a lost lamb pretending he knows which way he is headed. And even if some kind lady did train him up right, she did it to her standard and you, well, you are not her.
By this point in the game, he is either fooling himself into thinking he knows everything there is to know about pleasing you, or he is scared to death that you will ask for more than he knows how to give.
So the point is this: He needs to learn how to pleasure you, and before he will be able to bring himself to admit that fact and accept your instruction, he will need to have some confidence that his efforts will be rewarded with patience, encouragement, and appreciation. And the only way he is going to know that is if you tell him.
Men tend to be egotistical creatures; they crave constant reassurance and praise from those they care about. In most cases, a little positive feedback will go a long way toward motivating a man, and there isn't any subject closer to a man's heart than sex. If you take the initiative, you can make learning a happy time.
We hope this can be a positive experience for everyone. You can use our site to open the doors of communication and make sex a more enjoyable experience for both of you. It's full of ideas you can share with him to discuss and experiment with. It will help you show him that you're interested and responsive, giving him the confidence to learn more about what gives you pleasure. You'll be able to explore new things that can bring you more fulfillment in the bedroom. If coming here can help to kick-start that cycle of mutual pleasure and positive communication, then your pleasure will also be his.
Because that's what men want. What about you?
Here are some great resources for opening the dialog between you and your partner about what really turns you on:
Sex Talk: Uncensored Exercises for Exploring What Really
Turns You on by Aline P., Ph.D. Zoldbrod (Author), Lauren Dockett (Author)
Talking about sex, if done correctly, dissolves fears and inhibitions,
enhances intimacy, fuels desire, and creates trust between partners. In this
book, the authors show readers how to determine what they want from sexual
experiences and how best to communicate their desires. With 50 sex-talk
techniques combined with explicit illustrative stories, and by working through
candid exercises, readers build a sexual relationship grounded in truth and
understanding.
